God Sex and Spinach

"God is a circle of infinite radius having infinite centers and considering each human being to be discrete points inside the circle,are at equal distances from God !" Akshay said these solemnly without blinking even once

Since when did you start taking interest in such matters? Inquired Vijay

Do I look one who would venture into reading all this...common you guys know me !
That's exactly why we are worried.Hey everything's fine ? - Akash chipped in.

Akshay ,Vijay and Ajay are friends from college.They have shared everything ....well almost everything.Studied together,cheated together,hit out on girls together and even got rejected together.The most important part they all even got married almost at the same time.It has been a year that they met and after much effort they planned for a get together at Akshay's place in Delhi.Their wives also came along.

According to our Vedas there are 330 million Gods and Goddess!

Dude did you get hit by something or something really shocking happened or just that you are out of your mind?

"The most shocking thing which happened to me is marriage!Ever since I got married I have been constantly hearing lectures about Gods and Goddesses.Initially I did not pay much attention but slowly it grew like an obsession,"saying this Akshay put down his glass and reached for the bottle of scotch.He refilled his glass.Ajay helped him with 2 cubes of rocks and some soda.Sipping his new peg he resumed,"Guys my house is now like a temple where everyday some puja or the other keeps happening.I am thinking of replacing the calling bell at the front door with a 'ghanta' and hire a 'pujari' instead of a maid ."

All burst out laughing.All of them were in the third round of drinks.Their wives were having a separate conversation.Not about their husbands but about their mother -in-laws.The guys were re-living their college days.Under the influence of wine they were speaking more freely.

Yaar Akshay you can atleast sleep at peace.Temples do not open at night.If you hear me out, you would consider yourself lucky.Vijay kept his glass down and looking sideways started narrating.My wife is a doctor.She has this weird habit of relating everything medically.I can understand washing hands before having food or keeping house tidy but SEX....no way.

What she explains SEX in medical terms - Akshay asked curiously.

Yes dude you heard it right.She will explain the reasons of having sex.The pros and cons associated with it.The psychological aspect of it.But how do I explain that when you make out you simply make out.I do not require explanation or motivation for it.Arent we all motivated from the time we were sperms maybe!

Ajay and Akshay were thrilled to hear the narration from Vijay.Vijay has been quite a loser throughout his life.His hit ratio with girls has been pathetic.Yet he had this habit of bragging about his experiences.To find him in spot both were laughing their wits out.

Yaar Vijay we can understand your plight but really we cant help but laugh.- Akshay interrupted in between their amusement.

Ajay suddenly stood up and became silent.Everyone stared at him.He took a sip from his glass and supplemented with some fried cashew from the table.

You guys can at least have a sound sleep.I cannot do that as well.My wife has this obsession of having fresh fruits and vegetables everyday.I wake up everyday at 6 AM and head to the sabji mandi to buy fresh fruits and vegetables.

Akshay was shocked.You were the one who used to always miss the first period since it started from 9 AM.I do not recall a single day when you woke up at 6 AM.That's some achievement ! Hats off!

Yah what is game for the cat is death for the rat.Guys just because having fresh spinach gives you those extra few kilo calories and increases your eyesight doesn't mean I will compromise my sleep for it!

Just as the conversation was getting more interesting that their wives arrived.The guys suddenly stopped and stared stupidly at their wives and then at each other.

Akshay its already 11 PM.Tomorrow we have the Maa Santoshima puja at our home.I need to arrange for it.You better wrap up fast.

Vijay you better start having brandy.Scoth has molasses which will increase your Triglyceride levels in blood.She whispered something silently-"Ajay's wife mentioned having sex actually burns 300kCal of fat!"

You better be fast.

Ajay you need to get me some spinach and coriander leaves.I have a new preparation which Akshay's wife told me.You better hurry else you'll be late for market.

The three wives put in their ultimatum and left.The statements made by each was so very ironical.The guys were speechless.Each word they were discussing had been put to testimony.They heard it from the horses mouth.

However these are the most thick skinned people human race has ever seen.The toughest of papers,the most humiliating scolding or the worst rejection did not deter their spirits.The wives came in much later.All of them refilled their glasses and raised a toast.

To God!
To Sex!
and finally To Spinach !Cheers.


 Cheers,
Avique